Social Network

My sister, Caren, posted this fascinating article on Facebook a few days ago.  It's entitled The Anti-Social Network - By Helping Other People Look Happy, Facebook is Making Us Sad and discusses how people who use social networking sites can almost create a character that they want others to see  - post perfect pictures, list all our wonderful accomplishments, post little status updates that will draw praise from our "friends" etc.  By sifting through all these "air-brushed" versions of our "friends" on a daily basis, many people start to feel worse about themselves by playing the comparison game.  I have to admit, I've done it before myself.  "Oh, look at her status.  Her baby slept for 14 hours straight!  Why doesn't our baby do that?"  "Oh look, they actually have time to go out on romantic dates all the time."  "What?!  Their kid walked at 8.5 months?  Who do they think they are showing that off to the world?" (OK - that was us...I admit it.  I get sucked in to posting things I'm proud of on Facebook too!)

The article says, "Any parent who has posted photos and videos of her child on Facebook is keenly aware of the resulting disconnect from reality, the way chronicling parenthood this way creates a story line of delightfully misspoken words, adorably worn hats, dancing, blown kisses. Tearful falls and tantrums are rarely recorded, nor are the stretches of pure, mind-blowing tedium. We protect ourselves, and our kids, this way; happiness is impersonal in a way that pain is not. But in the process, we wind up contributing to the illusion that kids are all joy, no effort."

I am guilty of this on both Facebook and my blog.  I love to put funny quotes of things Camden said, announce with joy that he FINALLY slept through the night at age 2, show off Micah's adorable little smile that we can get on command now.  I love to post pictures once a month or so and I'm not gonna lie, I LOVE reading everyone's comments on them!  It's fun to show off our families.  I'm proud of my kids.  I'm proud of my marriage.  I'm proud of our little life that we've created for ourselves here in NH.  BUT, it's true...I don't often express my frustrations on the internet.  So, for those of you who think my life is just perfect and I have perfect children and nothing ever goes wrong, here are a few things that will make you feel better about your own life instead of worse!
-  I have not slept through the night in over 2.5 years!
-  Camden is at such a fun age right now, but there are moments (almost daily) when he absolutely makes me SO angry I could cry.
-  Sometimes it seems like Scott and I are two ships passing in the night.  His schedule is insanely busy and I miss him.
-  90% of the time I LOVE being a stay at home mom, but there are moments when I miss having more adult interaction and more of a sense of "purpose" - (although I do feel like this is where I'm meant to be and where I WANT to be...but there are moments when it's tough!)
-  I will never be as good of an athlete or as skinny as I was before I had kids.  grrrr.
-  Our house is going to be awesome, but gutting and renovating a house on top of two kids and Scott's full-time+ job is exhausting!
-  I hate folding laundry and it seems as though it's going to be a daily activity for the rest of my life.  ugh.
-  Money is tight now that we bought a house (we've always been frugal, but now we really have to be) and I can't just go to the outlets anymore to get out of the house.  (We did stop by Old Navy over the weekend and I spent $30 for $153 worth of clothes for the boys for next winter!  Bargain shopper!  :)
-  Sometimes I'm lonely and for the number of years that we've been here, I just don't feel like I've made as many close friendships as I would like to have.
-  I've been sick for four days now and my eyes are stinging and I need to go to bed!

There!  How's that for a reality check!  Now, this isn't a pity party.  In fact, I had some really awesome blog ideas I was going to write about that were infused with thankfulness and adorable photos of my precious children and happiness, and I'm still going to write those, but I also don't want to be one of those people who paints this "perfect" little picture of myself and my life and in turn make other people sadder (as the article talks about). 

Luckily, I can hold on to the truth that, "Though the darkness may last for the night, His joy comes in the morning."